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Wednesday probably started out as a normal day for Checkie Hessel and her toddler who spent her days at the Tots Unlimited Day Care but it quickly degenerated into a goatfuck of serious proportions. Checkie arrived at the daycare to pick her daughter up at 3:30 Wednesday afternoon. No big deal right? Yeah, all except for the part where she had already picked her daughter up shortly before noon.


Witness at the daycare said that Checkie appeared to be extremely drunk and also saw her driving. They also say that she seemed confused as to where her daughter was. During questioning she admitted to police that she had drank about a half-pint of vodka prior to driving to the day care. Hopefully it was something good like Three Olives Triple Shot Expresso because if you are going to be a stupid bitch and go to jail at least you should enjoy it.

Checkie’s next-door neighbor found the little girl at home, half-dressed, dirty and hungry, all by herself. She was reported to have been eating cheese and Ovaltine dry from the container.
Mesa police say that he did not remember picking up her daughter from the day care or leaving her home alone, had no idea what time of day it was and told them that she must have blacked out while she was at home and forgotten that she had already picked her up. She is currently facing charges of Child Abuse and Extreme DUI. That’s EXTREME DUI folks. Sort of like a new sport.
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