38-year-old Wikler Josue Moran-Mora, a pastor at the Seventh Day Adventist Church of Reform, wanted to spend more time with with his girlfriend. That’s understandable. A guy works hard and wants to see his girl. Almost romantic, all except for the part where he didn’t want his wife to find out. Ooops, Wikler Moran-Mora, you’ve really messed up now. Obviously this guy wouldn’t be getting featured here if he also hadn’t broken the law.
In order to get some private time with his sweetie Moran-Mora sent his wife a text message saying that he had been kidnapped, but that she shouldn’t panic (aren’t those two pretty much mutually exclusive?). Later on he sent some more text messages that said he was negotiating with the kidnappers for his own release. At that point his wife decided to call the po po.
Over a dozen Hillsborough, Florida (I really need to have a category just for Florida crime) Sheriff’s Deputies got involved with the search and they ended up finding Moran-Mora by triangulating his cell phone signal. When they found him of course Moran-Mora had to admit that he had made up the story in order to spend more time with the woman he was with.
He’s been charged with making a false report to law enforcement authorities and released on $500 bond.