George Kirby Got Drunk
It’s nice to think that when I get old I’ll be active and raising hell, but maybe not quite as active as 72-year-old George W. Kirby (I’ve also seen him listed as 61 a couple of places as well, so I’m not sure about the date except that’s what’s on his booking report). Old George there from Fort Myers had gone to the Social Security Office last Thursday morning to get a new Medicaid card but was asked to leave because he appeared intoxicated.
Several witnesses apparently tried to stop Kirby from getting in his truck to drive away but were unsuccessful. Once he got it started he jumped the curb and backed into another vehicle. The witnesses were finally able to get his keys until Lee County Sheriff’s deputies arrived on the scene.
When the law arrived they found several firearms in his truck including a little .22 single shot “pen” in his visor and bullets for it in the console. Kirby told police he was just trying leave, didn’t hit any other vehicle and was a good driver. Deputies also noticed that Kirby reeked of alcohol.
After Kirby started complaining of chest pain EMTs were called to the scene. He was loaded into an ambulance to be taken to the hospital. On the way George Kirby got violent and lashed out at an EMT, twisting her arms and wrist and leaving scratches.
Altogether George Kirby had a pretty eventful morning. Once he was released from the hospital he was taken straight to the county jail and charged with DUI, DUI damage to property, carrying a concealed firearm and aggravated battery.
Now that I think about it George Kirby does sound more like me in 30 years. Drunk and disorderly with plenty of firearms. Hell, Yeah!