Two Feet of Poo
SO the last couple of days I’ve been a bit under the weather. Actually I’ve been in a good deal of pain in my lower back and a little in my abdomen. I’m thinking some type of GI infection or a harbinger of another kidney stone. After the fun I had with that last one a while back I really don’t want a repeat.
Anyway, the discomfort has gotten bad enough that it’s a distraction at work. Bending and sitting make it worse. The wife told me I should go to the doctor and like a good husband I try and listen so I went to the doc in a box on the way home from work tonight.
I’ve been to this local hack shop a few times before and they seem to do a pretty good job. I wouldn’t go so far as to say I trust them but I guess it’s about as close as I’ll ever get with a doctor.
They took me back and did all the usual, weight, bp, heart rate, etc. The doc listened to my gut and decided to get x-rays. I had already told her I figured it was some type of infection or I was just really constipated. Turns out I was right. After spending $220 (I hadn’t met my deductible until tonight) and 45 minutes I found out what some of my employees already know. I’m full of shit.
Actually she told me I was backed up all the way to the colon and I was a bit arthritic in my back as well, which adds to the pain I guess. She told me to add fiber to my diet immediately and use a laxative on my next day off.
So as I am leaving the clinic I called the wife and told her. She asked “you are backed up all the way to the large intestine?”
“That’s like two feet of poo”
Damn. I’m bringing the camera for that one. Maybe the fucking plunger too. God help whoever has to go after I finally do.