December 2006

Due to popular request…

A bit of nipplage. When words for blogging just won’t come, show a body part or two.

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Wonderful Stuff

I know how much my wife and brother will enjoy having this jammed into their eardrums, and thought I would share it with EVERYONE else. Thanks to Lee for the link.


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Live Free or Die Hard!

You know you’ve been waiting for it. I know I have anyway. Bruce Willis kicks ass. The trailer for Die Hard 4 is up here. You can also find it on youtube, but the quality of the video isn’t as good. The movie synopsis says:

An attack on the vulnerable United States computer infrastructure begins to shut down the entire nation. The mysterious figure behind the shattering scheme has figured out every digital angle – but he never figured on an old-fashioned, “analog” fly-in-the-ointment: John McClane.

Hell, I might even drag my ass to the movie theater just to see it on the big screen.


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Nastiness

I don’t know what the hell I ate yesterday but it was damn sure worse coming out than it was going in. Sweet Jesus.


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Fudge Brownies

Getting slightly (just slightly) older, I always worry about losing control of my sphincter muscles during that wonderful act and you are about ready to orgasm but might have to fart too. Ever wonder what it’s like to get shit on? Yeah, me either, but this guy knows. Go check out his beautiful Christmas story. I will be laughing for days now. Much more fun than taking pictures of my own ass cheeks.

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Another Day in Paradise #7,295

On New Years Day I will have been with my company for twenty years. Damn. Some days it feels like 100 times longer, but there are days that I feel like I am still 20, just not as many. With three kids to get through college over the next 18 years, I have at least 20 more working for them. That’s the scary part. 20 more Christmases at work. Possibly I will get to spend a few with grandchildren, but there won’t be any with my kids.

Anyone else made fun of automated phone systems? My bank uses one. You can either punch in the selections, or use verbal commands. It’s pretty cool particularly since, like a dumb ass, I tend to check my balance when I am driving. It does a pretty good job recognizing different speech patterns. Lately I have been using different voices. It doesn’t do so well at Sam Kinnison (sp?) nor does it like opera. The people riding in their cars around me must wonder just what the fuck it is I am doing. The only saving grace for them is that it is cold and my windows are up.

The girls are on their winter trip to Hilton Head. They arrived earlier this evening. It’s weird because my son normally goes with them, but this year he stayed home with me. He has to work this weekend, and also has wrestling practice later this week as well. Tomorrow is my only day off until NEXT Thursday and Friday, so he gets to spend it with me cleaning the house from Christmas. I will get some cleaning done, but I am planning on sleeping in until I wake up. No alarms. No children beating me on the head to get me up.

Doing the bachelor thing, Chris and I are having pizza tonight. He offered to pay for it, which is cool. He didn’t want to wait for me to get home, since he got a checking account last month, he has received his fake visa and wanted to do it himself. I understand that. It is a small slice of adulthood that he can enjoy. Domino’s quit delivering to my town last month (the bastards) so we order from Papa Johns. I told him to get online at papajohns.com and it was pretty easy to understand. He called me up (I was on my way home from work) and seemed to be having problems with the website and I couldn’t really walk him through it over the phone, but he finally figured it out. A few minutes after I got home, he got a phone call from the pizza place, and they told him that they no longer deliver here. I told him to ask when they quit since I had just ordered from them last week. They told him four months ago, and hung up. I proceeded to call them back and asked for the manager to raise hell. After a few minutes of the conversation in which SOMEONE was really looking like a dumb ass, he said “who are you on the phone with, Domino’s?” I immediately stopped the conversation in which I now looked like a fucking retard and apologized to the lady and told her I would place an order online after we hung up. My son had ordered from Domino’s, even though we have not gotten a pizza from them in months. Fuck, I don’t need anyone else’s help to look stupid, I can do that quit easily on my own thank you very much.

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Christmas Desktop

My current desktop. I like it, but it is very bright. I don’t see using it but for a couple more days.

christmassy.jpg


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A quick break

I managed to get home for a couple of hours. I just woke up and am trying to suck down a cup of coffee before heading back. They were actually supposed to call me and wake me up 40 minutes ago, but have apparently forgotten. It was as bust as I had anticipated, maybe a bit busier, but the ugly part will begin in about 30 minutes, now that it is getting dark out.

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God, what a goatfuck

Tonight was just a short preview for me of what it will be like at work tomorrow. They got hammered about 7pm, and called me at 7:30. I went in an expedited until about ten or so. I have two waitresses that are basically just pieces of shit and will be gone soon after the holidays.

Their drawer was short $68 as well, which was a nice bonus.

I have to hit the sack, 4:30 comes too fucking early.

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Alien Ass Attack

My son turns 18 in January. Knowing how broke I am this year he has asked for a PC game, Alien Shooter: Vengeance, except that when he told me the name he said “Alien Shooter Colon Vengeance”. I about lost my cookies thinking about the alien ass munchers and where exactly they sell this game. Perhaps this is the sequel to Ass Fucking Zombies?

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