36 Things

Along with millions of other morons I have a MySpace account. I’ve had it for quite some time now and every great once in a while I will log on and deny the spammers that want to be my friend and check my email. Even less often I will post a blog over there, sometimes just cross-posting crap I have put up here. That’s more than likely what I will do here as well. I also check bulletins every once in a while as well. Not very often because I have more ‘friends’ that just aren’t than are. Of course, some of the folks on my friends list really are. Some are real life friends, some I have met through blogging, a couple are relatives. Most of them are bands or other people I don’t know and have no interest in meeting in real life. Thus the fact that I don’t read bulletins all that often. If you know me and want me to see something important, you have my email or you know where my blog is, fuck your bulletins.

So I was reading the bulletins and this one chick that works for me (big fucking mistake there) sends me a bulletin. Actually she sent it to all her friends, not just me. Oh, I don’t mean it’s a mistake that she works for me, I meant that it’s a mistake adding one of my employees to my friends list. I don’t know what the fuck I was thinking when I slipped up and added her to my friends. It’s not that I don’t want people to know who I am, for Christ’s sake I post all over the Internet with my real name. It’s just that 90% of the people that work with/for me are computer illiterate all the way up to the upper management and so I keep my Internet presence pretty low key with the other 10%.

Anyway, the bulletin she sent out for her friends to answer is below. I had fuck all to post tonight until I saw it and judging from the couple of paragraphs above I guess it did give me something to write about after all. The bulletin is pretty much a meme and although I am not tagging anyone, feel free to take the questions and post them on your site. I don’t know if I’m going to send this back via email or not (to her) but I did think you just might enjoy it

IF YOU’RE ON MY FRIENDS LIST, I want to know 36 things about you. I don’t care if we never talk, or if we already know everything about each other. Short and sweet is fine…You’re on my list, so I want to know you better.
BE HONEST!! COPY FROM HERE THEN SEND DIRECTLY TO ME IN A MESSAGE THEN, REPOST THE EMPTY QUESTIONS AS A BULLETIN.
FILL UP MY INBOX!!!!

1.)Q. Are you currently in a serious relationship?
A. Yes

2.)Q. What was your dream growing up?
A. Occasionally I had one about fucking my dog…Oh, that kind of dream. Sorry. I used to dream about being a fantasy/sci-fi author.

3.)Q. What talent do you wish you had?
A. I wish I could suck my own dick. I’d never have to leave the house.

4.)Q. If I bought you a drink what would it be?
A. Sam Adams

5.)Q. Favorite vegetable?
A. Christopher Reeve

6.)Q. What was the last book you read?
A. Fatal Revenant (The Last Chronicles of Thomas Covenant, book II)

7.)Q. What zodiac sign are you?
A. Sagittarius

8.)Q. Any Tattoos and/or Piercings? Explain where.
A. Couple of tattoos, pierced ears.

9.)Q. Worst Habit?
A. Farting in public

10.)Q. If you saw me walking down the street would you offer me a ride?
A. Ass, gas or grass, baby.

11.)Q. What is your favorite sport?
A. Cheerleader mud wrestling

12.)Q. Do you have a Negative or Optimistic attitude?
A. Depends on what day it is

13. )Q. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?
A. Grease you up like and ride you like a pony.

14.)Q. Worst thing to ever happen to you?
A. dropping out of high school

15.)Q. Tell me one weird fact about you.
A. The above answers weren’t enough?

16.)Q. Do you have any pets?
A. Yes. Oh, you want to know what they are? Dog, cat, goldfish in the pond.

17.)Q. What if i showed up at your house unexpectedly?
A. Watch out for the guy with the chainsaw.

18.)Q. What was your first impression of me?
A. Nice tits eyes

19.)Q. Do you think clowns are cute or scary?
A. Scary.

20.)Q. If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?
A. Lose the gut that’s been growing for the last decade.

21.)Q. Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?
A. Neither.

22.)Q. What color eyes do you have?
A. Hazel

23.) Q. Ever been arrested?
A. Yes

24.)Q. Bottle or can soda?
A. Can unless it’s in a glass bottle.

25.)Q. If you won $10,000 dollars today, what would you do with it?
A. Use $5k for Disney and the rest in my mutual fund.

26.)Q. If you could, would you date me?
A. Probably. 20 21 years ago when I was single. I was much nicer then.

27.) Q. What ‘s your favorite place to hang at?
A. My house. Pretty much a homebody. lame and boring.

28.)Q. Do you believe in ghosts?
A. yes

29.)Q. Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
A. kill nuns. jerk off. play on the computer.

30.)Q. Do you swear a lot?
A. fucking constantly.

31.)Q. Biggest pet peeve?
A. People that are fucking stupid.

32.)Q. In one word, how would you describe yourself?
A. Unflinchingly-cool (does a hyphenated word count)

33.)Q. Do you believe/appreciate romance?
A. believe in it, yes. Appreciate it, no. give me a fucking break, I’m a guy.

34.)Q. If you could spend 12 hours with me and ask/do anything you like, what would it be?
A. Got any KY?

35)Q. Do you believe in God?
A. No

36.)Q. Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you?
A Yes.

So, like I said, I guess I’ll fill this out but perhaps with a few different answers more fit for pubic public consumption. Later dudes.