Does This Cold Make My Ass Look Big?

Apparently someone has spent most likely millions to perform a study. The results of this study? The cold virus helps make you obese. Those damn Whopper certainly don’t hurt either.

I’m all for furthering science and our collective knowledge and all that but what exactly were they supposed to be studying here that led them to discover this earth-shaking revelation? My problem when reading articles such as this one that involve science and math is that a couple of sentences in I start hearing this dull buzz in my ears and my eyes roll to the back of my head and I start drooling. Just ask the wife, she’s a science teacher. She sees the look on occasion.

Not that I don’t like science or anything. Give me the fixings of something explosive or disgusting and I will experiment all day. I helped my daughter find a couple of articles the other day on home science projects that she could do. It’s just all of that freaking mumbo-jumbo that kills me.